Full transcript
0:01Hey there, sleepy head. What a
0:03coincidence meeting you here
0:05in your bed
0:07>> [laughter]
0:07>> in the middle of the night?
0:10But you said I could come over,
0:11remember?
0:12I never said you had to be awake or that
0:15I had to knock or that I couldn't come
0:17in through the window.
0:18And I interpreted your invitation as a
0:20standing offer, so
0:23the middle of the night is as good a
0:24time as any.
0:26So, I hope you don't mind me being here.
0:31I hope I'm not bothering you. Am I, baby
0:34boy?
0:35You looked kind of restless on the
0:37camera, shifting around so much, so I
0:39thought I'd come over and help comfort
0:40you to sleep. But if I'm being a bother,
0:43I could leave if you want. I'd only be
0:46leaving very, very reluctantly, but
0:49I'd leave all the same if that's what
0:51you really wanted.
0:52Would you like that?
0:58Mhm, good boy. Then I'll stay right here
1:01where my darling sweetheart needs me.
1:04There's nothing wrong with having mommy
1:06stay with you through rough night. In
1:08fact, I'd sleep with you in bed every
1:10night if you let me.
1:12Just because you're an adult doesn't
1:13mean you're too old to sleep with mommy.
1:15Besides, I'm not that much older.
1:18But anyway, so
1:21what's on your mind, cutie?
1:26Not in a very talkative mood, huh? Tell
1:29you what, how about I tell you what's on
1:31my mind and then you can see if you want
1:33to open up about what's on yours.
1:38So, personally, right now I'm thinking
1:40about how lucky I am to be in the bed of
1:42the cutest, most precious good boy in
1:45the entire world. He's adorable. Not
1:47even cat ears can make him cuter, which
1:50is a feat, let me tell you that. I feel
1:52like the luckiest woman in the world to
1:54be able to date him, to call him mine,
1:56which I do often because
1:59it's one of my favorite things to say.
2:01I'm so honored when he lets me run my
2:03fingers through his hair or
2:06lays his head down on my lap or chest to
2:09rest on. I'm blessed that he lets me
2:11watch over him, even if the cameras are
2:14probably a bit much, but
2:16I just feel so uneasy if I wasn't always
2:19keeping tabs on him because I have an
2:21overwhelming instinct to protect him and
2:23I worry he's in danger every moment I'm
2:25not watching him.
2:27And I am, of course, talking about you,
2:30my darling little teddy bear. Now, do
2:33you feel up to telling Mommy what's on
2:35your mind?
2:36What's giving my good boy trouble?
2:40Was it a bad dream? If you see a monster
2:42or something in your dreams, just think
2:44of me. Once I'm there, I'll kill all the
2:47monsters for you. Be they man or beast,
2:50god or mortal.
2:57Is someone causing you trouble?
2:59I can fix that.
3:01You know I can't let anyone get away
3:03with hurting my darling baby boy. Just
3:05tell me who it is. I'll hurt them any
3:07way you want. Salt in their wounds,
3:09needles in their throats, waterboarding,
3:11you name it.
3:15Are you sure no one is causing you
3:17trouble?
3:19If you say so, darling. Sorry if I was
3:22getting
3:23overzealous. You know how I can be. At
3:26least rest assured I would never attack
3:27anyone without your permission. Unless
3:29in defense, of course.
3:34Anyway, care to tell me what is keeping
3:35you up?
3:39Oh, you're touch-starved. Aw, baby. You
3:43know you can call on Mommy anytime you
3:44feel that way. I'm at your beck and
3:47call, sweetie. I'll touch you however
3:48you want, darling. So, if you want a lap
3:51pillow, a chest pillow, or to be my
3:53little spoon or something, all you have
3:55to do is ask.
3:57I'll do anything for you. Anything.
3:59Nothing is off the table.
4:02So, would you like something like that?
4:06I'm guessing that you would.
4:08Tell you what. Can I
4:11touch you?
4:12Can I say wrap my arms around you and
4:16hold your precious little head to my
4:18chest?
4:22Ah, there we go, baby. I hope I'm not
4:25holding you too tight. No?
4:28Good.
4:29Want me to hold you a little tighter?
4:33Of course, if my good boy wants it, my
4:35good boy gets it. And you are my good
4:37boy.
4:39>> [laughter]
4:42>> You look like you're having a good time.
4:44That's good. You deserve it. You deserve
4:46the world and more. You deserve
4:48everything you want and need. I pledge
4:51to give everything you want that is
4:53within my power to give.
4:56Even if I have to lie, swindle, or steal
4:59to get it.
5:07Is this the sort of thing that makes you
5:09feel loved?
5:12I'm not saying that in a judgmental kind
5:14of way or anything. I'm actually really
5:16glad if this is the way that you like to
5:19receive affection.
5:20I I guess what I'm trying to say is that
5:23I love you very, very, very much. You
5:26are my very, very good boy after all,
5:28and sometimes I struggle with how I
5:30should express that love.
5:33Sometimes I rack my brain thinking about
5:35how I should show you that I love you. I
5:37just can't decide whether I should sign
5:39my soul off to you or pull the stars
5:41from the night sky to give them to you.
5:43But
5:44you like this, right?
5:55That's good. It's it's very simple. A
5:59lot simpler than pulling stars from the
6:01sky, anyway.
6:02Mommy likes this, too. Holding you like
6:04this. Not just cuz it makes you happy,
6:07although I do like that, too.
6:10It just feels right.
6:12You're mine.
6:14Holding you is only natural.
6:16You're all mine.
6:18And I refuse to share.
6:23How could I share someone as precious as
6:26you? When you look at me, I think about
6:28what a great honor it is
6:30that your eyes met mine, and I want to
6:32honor that completely to myself.
6:35To hoard it all for me, and only me.
6:39And as for your touch?
6:42Well, if you told me earlier about you
6:44being so touch-starved, I'd be a lot
6:46more physically clingy. I was holding
6:48back a bit before now, as hard as that
6:50is to believe. I know I must already
6:52seem touchy-feely to you, but that was
6:54actually how I act when I'm restraining
6:56myself. If I wasn't holding back, I'd
6:59probably stick to you like glue every
7:00second of the day.
7:04So,
7:06correct me if I'm not reading you right,
7:08but does this mean I can be
7:10you know, less restrained in the future?
7:14Like, if we go on a walk or something, I
7:16can cling to you, right?
7:18Do I have to ask first, or is it like a
7:20blanket permission kind of a thing? And
7:22if we're in private, can I just hug you
7:24whenever?
7:26I mean, obviously I'm not going to hug
7:28you when you're, say, carrying a pot of
7:30hot water or something, but I mean,
7:33other than those sorts of situations,
7:35can I?
7:40Okay. Thanks for clearing that up, baby
7:42boy. You're such a sweetheart.
7:44I know it must seem a weird like "Oh,
7:47Mommy will put cameras in the walls, but
7:49hugging without permission is where she
7:50draws the line." But, even if I have my
7:52no-nos, I try to some extent to be a
7:55level-headed person
7:56because I love you. But,
7:58anyway,
8:00I'll be hugging you a lot more from now
8:01on, so you look forward to that.
8:10Oh, I think I forgot to tell you
8:12you're very brave. Mommy just wants you
8:15to know that.
8:17For telling me about your problem, you
8:19were willing to make yourself
8:20vulnerable, opening up to me like that,
8:22and
8:23that's just one more thing I love about
8:24you, baby. I was really happy.
8:27Not just because it's a positive trait
8:29being brave like that, but also because
8:31it's a sign of a certain level of trust
8:33in me. At least I think so.
8:36I'm overjoyed you would be willing to
8:37show that side of yourself to me.
8:39Thank you.
8:41From the bottom of my heart,
8:43thank you.
8:48Are you starting to get sleepy?
8:51I certainly am, which is weird. I
8:53thought just the chance to stare at you
8:55more would keep me wide awake, but
8:58I guess you're really good sleep aid,
9:00being my teddy bear and all.
9:02I want to do this more often.
9:05Could we
9:07could we make this a more regular thing?
9:11The two of us like this?
9:14Cuddling to sleep?
9:16I want to be able to experience this joy
9:18every night. Even just seeing you in
9:20person as I fall asleep is a treat.
9:23You're much more lovely to see in person
9:25rather than just on the camera.
9:27Of course, you're a sight for sore eyes
9:29either way.
9:32We can make this a regular thing back at
9:33my place if you like. Just the two of us
9:36every night. My place is super clean and
9:38tidy and I hid all the creepy stuff.
9:41Like your pictures in a secret room, so
9:44it won't be in plain sight to disturb
9:45you.
9:46And my bed is super soft, too. Not as
9:49soft as me, but it's close.
9:52So, what do you say, cutie?
9:56Mhm, music to my ears. Tomorrow night
9:58onwards, then.
10:00For now, we sleep.
10:02Sweet dreams, baby boy.
10:04Mommy loves you so much.