Full transcript
0:00I'm David Brockway. I'm the manager of the Great Men Project.
0:04We deliver workshops on gender equality
0:06to teenage boys in schools across London and the South East.
0:09Our topics include sexual harassment, homophobia, pornography and consent.
0:14But especially, we talk about masculinity, feminism
0:17and what it really means to be a man.
0:26Adult men don't really talk about these issues very much.
0:29We want to get that conversation normalised
0:30starting at an early age.
0:32We use participatory activities, such as word association games.
0:36These allow the boys to explore stereotypes
0:38that might be in their heads.
0:40We'll ask them to talk about the first word that comes into their head
0:42when they think of a certain topic.
0:44For instance, when they're asked to think about men
0:46they may come up with brave, strong or daring.
0:49For women, they may come up with gentle, kind and caring.
0:53So then we ask how and why?
0:54What causes these stereotypes?
0:56Where do the boys get ideas like
0:58it's weak for men to cry, or men are strong, women are weak.
1:02Most of the boys have never had conversations like this before.
1:05Our most powerful moments are when we have lightbulb moments.
1:08When boys have the opportunity, through talking to each other,
1:11to realise that some of these ideas that they think they know
1:14are actually a result of conditioning and the world around them.
1:18Toxic masculinity is talked about a lot these days.
1:21We would define it as..
1:27On top of the litany of negative consequences
1:30that these behaviours have for women and girls,
1:32there are also many negative consequences for men and boys.
1:35At the top of this list would be mental ill health and suicide.
1:39Suicide rates in this country
1:40are currently much higher for men than they are for women.
1:43In our workshops we find that boys have a lot of difficulty
1:46expressing their emotions, accepting emotional vulnerability
1:50and admitting to any form of weakness.
1:52Our workshops encourage boys to critique phrases such as,
1:55"Man up" and "Take it like a man."
1:57Which are really saying boys don’t cry,
2:00and boys don’t ask for help when they're feeling down.
2:03The phrase "Man up" is particularly important for us.
2:05It's two words that, put together, mean absolutely nothing,
2:09but any man can tell you that, when told to do so,
2:11they know exactly what was expected of them at that time.
2:15For years, the responsibility of dealing with these problems
2:18has been on women.
2:19Grappling with sexism, sexual harassment and harassment at work.
2:23We feel that solving these issues is equally the responsibility of men.
2:28That's why it's so important to get these conversations started early,
2:31to bring boys into this discussion so they can have a chance
2:34to not take forward those negative ideas and stereotypes.
2:38One of our most difficult topics is pornography.
2:40Our approach is not to shame anyone, but to ask questions such as,
2:44"is this a good place to learn about sex?",
2:46"Can this be degrading?" and "Where's the consent in this?"
2:49We aim to educate the boys about the porn industry
2:53to tell them that it can often be unsafe and coercive for women,
2:56that the things on display are rarely representative
2:59of a mutually pleasurable sexual experience.
3:02Sometimes the boys we work with
3:03go back to a home environment
3:05that is contrary to all of the things we've discussed.
3:07What they are taught and learn from the media
3:09is the total opposite of discussions they had with us.
3:13Healthy relationships are about respecting, caring and communicating.
3:17Our aim is to plant a seed
3:19that will allow the boys we work with to start questioning these things
3:21and create their own version of being a man.